Epic Poker Face
by facethewraithofshadow
Summary: Lovino and Antonio end up going out and it starts in Lovi's bedroom, involves the police and breaking a bed and sandpaper. It's crazy.


**WARNING!**

**NOT FOR NON-YAOI READERS.** **INCLUDES**** SPAMANO SMUT AND REFERENCES TO EXTREME SEXUAL CONTACT. GERITA REFERENCES AND SEXUAL THEMES.**

**YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!**

**_Dear Diary,_**  
**_Today, I had another dream about Antonio. Why can't I get that bastardo out of my head?!_**

**_In my dream, he and I were... Touching each other. Not to say I didn't enjoy the dream, it's just... I wish It hadn't been just a dream._**

**_Other news it that Feliciano won't shut up about him and that potato-sucking bastard. It's ANNOYING!_**

**_Antonio and his friends were talking about their sex-lives in the living room and Francis kept on telling them about how Arthur was touching him the night before._**

**_The potato bastard's brother said that he and that Canadian were messing around with that stupid American and that they... I'm not even going to write that shit in here._**

**_Antonio, shockingly, came out about being a virgin and Francis shook his head saying "If you don't find someone soon, we're going to take you to a club to find a woman. Or a MAN to defile."_**

**_There's something SERIOUSLY wrong with that French guy. To be honest. I kinda want to tell Antonio about my dreams. God knows what he'd do if I did, though._**

**_I'm graduating from my last year at collage tomorrow..._**

**_Lucky. Fucking. Me._**

**_I got the hell out of the dorm room when my roommate walked out of the bathroom and tossed an issue of "BRAZZERS" On the coffee table, touched ALL of my tomatoes, and washed his hands. In that exact order._**

**_FML._**

**_Anyway, back to Antonio. I have no idea why, but I feel... I think I... Love him. I have no idea what the fuck I'm writing right now..._**

**_I'll write again tomorrow. Another day of hell tomorrow. I have to go to my last day of Biology and then I 'get' to go to get my diploma in that SHIT robe thing and that stupid square-shaped hat that you're supposed to throw in the air._**

**_Let's see if I survive without a heart attack at all the idiocy..._**

* * *

And that was how I got a boyfriend.

After my graduation (Which wasn't as bad as I thought it would be) Antonio picked me up from campus, congratulating me on getting my degree in Medical Tech. I was quiet most of the ride home, but I did hum to my favorite song as it cam on the radio.

My brother was sitting in his potato bastard's lap when we got home and he was GROPING that German's CROTCH. What the fuck, Feliciano?

Antonio hung out in the dining room with his trio and I went upstairs to sleep. We covered a few things in Biology before I got my diploma, but that was it.

I pulled out my diary to write again, but drew up a balnk and just tossed the black-covered book on the floor.

I laid back into the soft pillows of my bed and sighed as I started thinking about Antonio again.

Why? Is? He? So? SEXY?

I had no idea, but I knew I liked this day-dream. I woke up a couple hours later to a bunch of screaming from downstairs, Feliciano crying and his bastardo comforting him. At least the potato bastard takes care of my little brother.

I went downstairs and into the kitchen to get something to eat when I saw that albino reading a black book. I thought nothing of it at the time.

As soon as I put the pasta in the pan, I realized that it was my diary and I froze.

I turned slowly and saw Antonio looking at my last entry from yesterday and my heart stopped.

Aw, shit!

I acted nonchalant about it and shrugged it off, hoping they didn't already read the sex-dreams page.

I stopped again.

Fuck.

THAT'S what my little brother was screaming about. He was probably trying to keep from laughing his ASS off.

Assholes.

I made my pasta and sat down on an extra chair, eating and occasionally looking up at Antonio, who I caught staring at me a few times.

God. Damn it.

I have NEVER been so un-comfortable in my entire life. He knew about my dreams and that was certain. I just hoped he didn't talk to me about it in front of everyone. HE didn't, but his albino friend did.

"Hey. Lovino, right? * Chuckle. * I found zis on ze floor upstairs, und I thought I'd give it a look. * Chuckle. * Ya'know... I had no idea that you always wanted to fuck Antonio... "

The bastard burst out laughing, along with Francis, my brother and his bastard. Antonio just turned and sat facing away from me as I dropped my fork and blushed redder that the sauce of my pasta.

I stood and set my plate down, going over to the fridge and grabbing a block of cheap cream-cheese, throwing it at Gilbert and keeping a straight face as it connected with his face and splattered everywhere. I grabbed my diary without saying another word and walked out of the now silent room, the blush still reddening my face.

WHY CREAM-CHEESE?!

A few minutes later, I was writing in my diary about what just happened, when Antonio came into my room, sitting on the foot of the bed and looking at me. I hid my face with my diary and sunk into the pillows.

"Y-yeah? What do you want, Antonio?"

He spoke quietly and slowly, not emphasising any words or changing his tone at all.

"Lovino. I... Have no idea what to say. I'm shocked, really."

He moved my diary, revealing his stunning, intoxicating, sinfully sexy, intense, beautiful Emerald eyes. My heart raced and I couldn't look away, no matter how flustered they were making me feel.

" Lovino. I... I love you. I have for a while. " He was blushing severely and I felt a tear well up in my eye. I blinked it back, sitting up and hugging him, throwing my arms around his neck.

" Antonio. You have no idea how happy I am right now. " I hugged him close, turning to him and realizing that our lips were almost touching. I blushed darkly and looked forward into his amazing eyes again.

He looked into my very soul and my heart beat faster than it had been before, my eyes becoming half-lidded as I realized how close our bodies were. I pressed my mouth forward, connecting our lips and I buried a hand into his hair, feeling his tounge on my lips and opening my mouth for him.

He tangled our tounges and explored my mouth with an intense passion that I could only dream of prior. His strong, yet gentle hands wrapping around my waist and holding my closer to his hot body. I moaned softly and than, out of nowhere, I felt a tug on my curl.

My first instinct was to shove him away and yell, but it was over-ridden by my desire for him. I moaned and collapsed into the pillows again, pulling him down with me and wrapping my legs aroung his waist, grinding our hips together and moaning at the deliciaous friction it caused.

He ran a hand down my chest and removed my shirt, licking and sucking my nipples and making me moan aloud in pleasure.

He continued like this before trailing his tounge down my chest and pulling down my pants. I moaned loudly as he licked at my cock, sucking it hard and massaging it with his devilish tounge.

"AH! T-Toni! Oh god... "

I had never felt that before and it felt amazing. He stopped and came back up, kissing me passionately as I whined from the loss of the tight heat of his sexy mouth.

He removed his own shirt and connected our lips again, clawing at his belt and un-doing his own pants. I ripped them off, kicking off my own and I looked up and into his eyes.

"Antonio. Ah. F-fuck me. Please! "

I needed him and I needed him badly. He placed three fingers to my lips and commanded "Suck."

I sucked his fingers as sensually as I could, twirling my tounge aroung them all and licking up and down on them, hearing him grunt only fuled the flame.

As he pulled his fingers out, the break of suction making a satisfying 'pop', I looked up at him before he started to stretch me and I said "Make me scream, Toni."

And just that he did. He slipped in his finger, swirling it rapidly and sticking in another, scissoring them and thrusting them in and out of me as I moaned loudly at his touches. It hurt, but it also felt damn good. He slipped a thrid finger in and hit one spot in me that made me see stars.

" AH! T-TONI! AH, FUCK! D-DO THAT AGAIN! "

I felt the sensation again and moaned his name in pleasure, bucking my hips onto his fingers and looking for more. He removed his fingers, making me wimper, but when he slid himself in, I moaned loudly.

FUCK! It felt so damn good! He thrust in fast and he hit that spot hard, making me arch my back and scream. He pulled out almost completely and thrust back in, hitting it again and grinding as he connacted.

" ANTONIO! AH, GOD! YES! OH, FUCK YES! "

I could barely feel my throat from my screaming as he thrust into me hard and fast, connecting with that one spot often, making me moan his name over and over and over again.

My mind was spinning and I thrust back just as hard and strong, opening my legs wider and allowing him to hit my spot every. Single. TIME. I screamed as loud as I could, moaning and gripping my bedsheets tightly in my fists, ripping the fabric as I moaned.

He thrust in faster and harder, hitting the head-board of my bed against the wall and leaving a large dent in the wall as he moved my entire bed with his thrusts, all hitting my spot and making me see white. I felt a knot tighten in my stomach.

That knot came out of me, along with a LOT of cum, the most amazing feeling in the world. I felt a hot liquid fill me and I knew he'd cum as well.

I moaned again as he pulled out of me and collapsed next to me on the bed, panting just as heavily as I was.

" T-ti amo... "

I at least managed to breathe THAT out. I panted and laid back into my pillows, hearing his reply.

" Ti amo, Lovi. "

Lovi. No one had called me that in... Forever. I smiled and cuddled into him, not caring one bit about my fucked up sheets.

I felt his arm come around my shoulders and I rest my head on his chest, still panting. He smiled down at me and I felt a hand in my hair, cautious of my curl.

I looked up at him and I kissed him again.

I heard laughing coming from downstairs and I realized the door was OPEN the entire time we had this steamy, hot, passionate, un-believbly PHENOMONAL sex. I blushed as I heard someone yell " Give it to him, Toni! "

I blushed and buried my face in the crook of his neck, wimpering.

" Assholes. "

He hugged me and said " Don't listen to them. "

He shouted back at them, replying " I don't think he can take anymore. "

Just to prove him wrong, I sat up, crawling on top of him and rubbing our cocks together.

" Oho! Nevermind! I think he's up for round two! "

He chuckled and groaned as our dicks rubbed, feeling my erection rub against his now hard cock. I smirked.

" I'll go another round... Only if I get to top this time... "

He bit his lip and moaned quietly.

" Waddaya think, guys? Should I let him top this time? "

His friends laughed and I soon heard one of them talking. I couldn't hear what he said, but everyone down there laughed.

" Fuck him UP, Lovino!"

" Yeah! Make him crippled! "

" I DARE you to break the bed! "

After that last one, my pupils dialated and Antonio chuckled. All of his firends laughed their asses off.

" Deal! "

Antonio quirked an eyebrow at me, but I just ground into him again, making him moan and clench his eyes shut. I reached into my bed-side table and pulled out the "Fire and ICE" lube my roommate gave me for christmas.

I popped the top and squirted some of the tingly fluid onto my fingers, hissing in pleasure as the hot and cold tingling sensation started.

I reached down and slipped two fingers into him, smirking at his loud moan of intense pleasure as the lube tingled his entrance and my fingers worked their own magic inside him.

His friends laughed as his moan could be heard. Fuck, probably from next door. I scissored my fingers, playing with his entrance as he moaned louder and bucked back on my fingers.

I smirked and slipped in my third finger, twisting them up and stabbing them into his sweet spot, the same way he did to me.

He screamed loudly and bucked back on my fingers, ramming them back in his spot and his screamed my name, making my cock harder.

I kept stretching him, purposefully avoiding that spot just to tease him. He screamed in sexual frustraion as I avoided his spot, and I removed my fingers entirely, squirting some of the lube on my erection and groaning in pleasure as the tingling worked itself on my dick.

I lined up and thrust in, immediately going balls-deep in him and pulling out again before I thrust back in and slammed his entire body down into the bed, hitting his spot and hitting it HARD.

His scream was loud enough to break the sound barrier and I smirked, pulling out and thrusting back in and doing that over and over, faster and harder than he had been with me.

He screamed every time I pushed him into the bed, making it creak each time. Eventually, it actually DID break and caused a new position of the bed.

This new position caused me to go in deeper and harder and faster, making him scream VERY loudly as I hit his spot every single time.

I eventually felt that knot again, but I held it in. That is. Until I felt him constrict around me. As soon as he went tighter, I lost it and my cum exploded out of me, filling him and dripping out around my cock.

I pulled out of him and fell into my broken bed, smirking as I heard the cheering and cooing from downstairs.

" DAMN! That kid's pretty good! "

" He BROKE the bed! I didn't think he had it in him! "

" Hey. Antonio! Can you even feel you ass right now? "

" I doubt it! DUDE! The neighbors called the police! They think someone got their ass kicked! I guess there's SOME truth to that. "

Everyone oooh-ed at that and Antonio was still wimpering and panting. I put on a pairs of shorts and a loose T-shirt, walking to the door awkwarldy, as I still had cum in my ass.

As soon as I opened the door, the officer asked * We got a... Noise complaint. What's going on here? '

I chuckled and replied. " Sorry about that. It was all me. My boyfriend kinda... You get the picture. "

There were chuckles behind me, but the officer's intense gaze silenced them. He glared back at me and said " What the fuck do you think you're tryina pull, slut? "

I breathed in smoothly and exhaled shaprly.

" How about this. FUCK YOU UP THE ASS WITH SOMETHING HARD AND SANDPAPER-Y, YOU FUCKING COCK-SUCKER! "

I slammed the door and walked back upstairs, the guys laughing their asses off and when I got back to the room, Antonio chuckled.

" Hard and sandpaper-y? I love you, Lovino. "

I crawled on top of him and kissed him passionately.

" I love you too, Toni. "

And that was the end of that day. It was pretty good and I made some new friends. Turns out that 'potato bastard' isn't half bad after-all.

So yeah.  
Moral of the story?  
Always go with the flow.  
Stay classy, biches!

* * *

**To all eight people who read my last story, trick or treat. I am SO sorry I haven't posted a new chapter! I tried to type one, but I drew a blank. If any of you have a suggestion for it, I'll gladly write it and credit you, but I'm blank as of the moment. This was an old SpaMano that I had in my notebook and has references to my trick or treat story in it. If you caught that, congrats! You're brain is working. Also, I'll be posting a few more old ones on here soon, so if you want more, it'll be up soon. I think I'll be doing a demon one, but of course, you guys decide. Once again, continue, or no? **

**Happy Fapping!**

**Have a Crack-tastic day!**

**Also, just as a side-not. These are my FAVORITE YouTube channels. I think the're awesome and deserv a look-see. So. Here we go. ToBuscus. AWESOME. GUY! Smosh. They're just hilarious. JacksFilms. AWESOME! PweDiePie. JOIN THE BRO-ARMY NOW, BROSKI! SeanKlitzner. He's pretty funny too. And of course. ShadowSheikiah! Not a famous YouTuber yet, but mein liebe! She's the America AND Canada of our group and I'm ze awesome Prussia. She's an AWESOME person and you should check out her channel on YouTube as well as her account. She's McBuscus and she wrot a cople of EPIC FanFics. She's a freaking GENUIS! Shout-out to mein liebe! Another thing to check out is Foamy the Squirrel. He's an awesome squirrel who actually makes some pretty balid pints in his rants, as well as awesome humor. You don't have to check any of this out if you don't want to, I'm merely a messenger of the information. Bye. I'll post another FanFic soon!**


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